singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
