We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
