help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
