i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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