Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
