I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
