You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
