I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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