i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
