i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
