there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
