he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize