HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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