She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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