and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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