Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
