hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
