Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
