she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
