i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
