My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
