i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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