24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
