dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
