Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
My breasts were aching with rage.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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