That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
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