I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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