some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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