i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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