If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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