I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
