We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize