Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Randomize
