You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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