your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
