ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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