scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
