I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Randomize
