Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
