First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
