I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
