THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize