you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
