I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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