i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
