This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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