apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
