That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
its not stalking. its research.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
