I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
