This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
